"This" isn't working

Yesterday I started my monthly re-commitment to Weight Watchers. That's right - probably nearly as effective as a "New Years resolution" - I have made the "Upcoming Birthday Resolution" to drop 10 lbs/get in shape/blah blah blah - thank goodness I don't smoke or I'd have to add that to the list too! As I measured my food out last week (that would have been my first attempt at my monthly re-commitment to WW) Mike said "oh you're doing this again". Great, that's support. But it got me thinking. It seems like I am always doing "this". "This" doesn't seem to be working. There is something not quite right with my approach. I don't want to be on the Oprah plan. I don't need to break down in 15 years because I am still yo-yoing and still trying to lose that damn 10-15 lbs. Okay, Oprah has a bit more to lose, but this is my blog, not hers. So...I'm working on "this". I think it might be deeper than what I decide to eat. I think I need to look at the "why" I decide to eat. I'm a fairly bright girl. I know that a cinnamon roll isn't good for me. It does not fuel my brain or my body. So why do I turn off the voice that tells me all the reasons not to eat it and listen to the voice that says "mmmmm....cinnamon, butter and sugar is good....mmmmmm" I think the answer to that question might help me with "this".

I'm not sure the goal or purpose of this blog. Originally I thought it was about turning 40, but I think it might be just ramblings of an almost 40 year old...no particular subject, just going where my head goes.